Should I tell my friend I caught her man cheating?

So I caught my friend’s man cheating

Ok,  here’s the scene. It’s one of the last nights of summer and I and a friend decide to go to a roof top party at a popular bar. I wasn’t going to stay at first because it was extremely  humid, but the DJ was great, the drinks were flowing and I was having a good time so we stayed. As I’m at the bar ordering a drink I hear someone behind me say” I’m paying for her.”  I  look up to see my good friend’s boyfriend behind me .Of course we know each other so  I spoke, we hugged, I asked about my girl because I assumed he was out with his guys and I told him I’d see him later.  Fast the fuck forward, I’m about to leave and I see him hugging a girl from behind. I told myself to let it go but I couldn’t stop staring and his eyes met mine. At this point I’m thinking to myself “Did this fool buy me a hush drink?”.  He tried to dodge me but I went into stalker mode and began to follow them around, yes I did. They sat at a table and I sat there too. After a few moments of awkwardness, the girl looks at him and says “bae who is she?”. OK at this point I’m steaming mad! Why is this heffa calling my friend’s man bae? I snapped a pic which I later deleted). He became irritated and they left. I guess when you’re cheating, you get annoyed by being caught.

The next morning my first thought was “you have to tell her” but my second though was “mind your business lady”. Now, for the dilemma, Part of me wanted to call her up , spill all the tea and tell the story scene by scene with animations . Other part of me does not want to see my friend hurt and I definitely didn’t want to be the one delivering the hurt. What really stopped me is that I have been there before, I revealed to a friend of mine that her man was cheating . Now this was my friend of over 15 years at that point, but when I told her that boyfriend was cheating, he convinced her that I was jealous and made the story up. Never in my wildest dreams would I have believed she’d do that to me , she broke my heart , but hey guess the dick was amazing.


I just wasn’t willing to risk my friendship like that again so I couldn’t tell her. What’s done in the dark will always come to  the light so I gave it to the universe to deal with. However, it tears me up on the inside when I see him because I feel like he feels as if he got away with something. Does he think I’m keeping this secret for him? Does he think buying that drink kept me quiet?  What if he grows a conscious and tells her and she finds out that I knew? It’s 6 months later, they’re still together and she seems happy so I never said a word. In other words, it would seem to be the right thing for me to tell my friend, but it may not be the best thing in terms of the greater  good of everyone involved.  It’s just not worth the hassle in my opinion.

Would you tell your friend you caught their partner cheating? Would you want someone to tell you?

13 Replies to “Should I tell my friend I caught her man cheating?”

  1. I’m telling! If my friend don’t tell me about mine we ain’t friends

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      I’m with u in theory but I’ve learned to shut up lol

    2. BeatsByJes says:

      It seems so simple…

  2. This is a hard one! I would PERSONALLY like to be told. This definitely isn’t the case for everyone. If my friend has my best interest at heart, I’d definitely believe her. People do shit like this every day and walk around looking foolish while their significant other is chillin with the side piece. I wouldn’t go as far as to say I would be mad at the friend because I know that it takes a lot to do something like that. But I would probably be upset because you would think that your friendship is bigger than that. I think you really have to KNOW that friend! Good topic!

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      I would tell u whether u wanted to hear it or not lbs …I def wouldn’t have u out there lookin foolish but I don’t think of u as a friend anymore more like family so I wouldn’t care if u got mad

  3. Damn! Such a good read! And been there before same shit happened! And that is the reason I stay quiet!

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      Exactly smh

  4. Such a tricky situation. I honestly don’t know what I would do in this situation and I hope I never have to.

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      Right!!! It’s hard to say what you would do cuz it’s such a touchy situation!

  5. IM TELLIN! ? Seriously I would tell and watever she chooses do so with the information is her business. I really couldn’t care less how she handles the situation but I would feel like I’m not being a real friend if I witnessed something with my own eyes and didn’t share. I would definitely want to know if my man was out here clowning. So u better tell me chick! Lbs!

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      lol I’m with u…don’t have me looking crazy !

  6. I would tell my best friend. Only if i have undeniable proof. She would know I’m not lying

    1. BeatsByJes says:

      Undeniable proof huh?! You’d snap pics!? Lol

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